A new journey begins…

My friend at the Cafe!

I have a friend at the coffee shop. I don’t know her name but she knows mine. She also knows what coffee I usually order. Every morning, one of the motivations I have, to come to office, is my coffee and a small chat with my friend. We talk about everything, about the weather, the food, my evenings, her evenings, about flowers and life in general.

She is a beautiful young lady with a warm smile. She talks to everyone very nicely; everyone likes her I believe. She has very beautiful eyes. Just the other day, my hands were very cold and I was freezing in the Melbourne winter. When she met me for taking my order, she was feeling bad for me and said I should buy gloves. Later, when I was going out for lunch, she offered me to wear her gloves, in case I am too cold. I felt really gratified with her gesture.

We don’t know each other well, neither we spend so much time together, but the small gestures of love make my day warm. Such are the effects of ‘being human’.

Today when I went to grab my afternoon coffee, the café was quite empty. My friend came over and offered me a cookie from her own share. I gladly accepted. Then she said today is her last day in this café! I felt a gush of sadness crept inside me. I didn’t know what to say! I looked at her and she smiled and said, “You’ll make new friends”. She said she is travelling to Northern Australia and after she comes back, she would join some other café, somewhere else. She also shared her gratitude towards me and said how nice its been talking to me all these last five months in this café.

I finished my coffee and walked up to her to say the final good bye. She gave me a hug and said, take care. I started walking back to my work and didn’t turn back.

They say, “Goodbyes are never forever”. I wonder why I felt bad when she said she is leaving, why I never asked her, her name. This is life! We make friends and then bid them farewell and then make new friends again in the journey of life. Sometimes you suddenly don’t see that same face you see everyday and search for it, faces change, everyday. Sometimes you can’t even say good bye to everyone you love. That’s the truth.

Just be nice to everyone you meet, say hi and ask how are they doing. Life is too short to have grudges. I will miss my friend at the coffee shop tomorrow, but who knows, maybe I will see another warm face saying, “What coffee would you like”?🙂

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What’s your song?

They say, “Everyone has their own song”. A song that connects them to eternity, to love, to life and to themselves. Similarly, every relationship has its own song. A song that is reminiscent of time immemorial or of something exceptional. A song is your own because it relates to some specific personal event, it is own because our life finds its rhythm and music in that song. Whenever we hear that song, we remember the event or the person to which this song is allied and treasure our solace at heart.

Some songs remind us of a journey, some remind us of home, some of our parents or grand parents, some songs remind us of friendship and some of love. Sometimes the tune of an old song takes you back to the memory lane and you even land up making a call to an old friend or a lost love. Some songs make you cry while some make you smile but every song stirs a feeling inside your heart. The tears are the witness of some painful incident with which this song was concomitant. The smile on the other hand is the evidence that this song is part of some happy memory. A song reflects the state of your heart at that instance of time and that in turn makes a song your own. You hum the tune when ever you want to revisit that occurrence of time.

Humans are very possessive. They don’t want to let go of time. They want to cling on to time either in form of a photograph or a song or a video or something tangible that takes them back to the memory lane. A song is a way to capture a moment forever. Sometimes on a gloomy day, I remember the lullaby my mom used to sing for me when I was a child, it’s a vent to revisit my childhood days. When I miss my best friend, I remember the songs we sang together on our journeys and in many of our memorable trips. My favourite songs have changed over time. Some new ones have become my favourite now and some old ones are slowly fading away from my memory with time.

I guess life is also like a song. People come and go, some stay forever and some fade with time. Lucky are those who find their song and for the rest, have you tried finding your song yet?🙂

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Dear Diary…

Dear Diary,

I am missing you a lot. When suddenly your pages were over, I was crammed with a sudden vacuum, despair, and fear. I shuffled through to the previous pages in the hope of coming across another blank page where I can write my thoughts down but there were none! You were suddenly over. I still started scribbling in the white spaces on the top of the margin area, or wherever I could find any half-filled pages. I just didn’t want to let go of you. I wanted to hold on to you till all the white spaces were filled with my thoughts, words, emotions, and feelings. I was possessive. Knowing the fact that I can always buy a new one, that there are millions of diaries being sold in this world everyday, I just couldn’t believe that my personal diary is not going to be with me anymore. It was a painful feeling.

I spent all night reading you from the scratch. Every page I read, my memories were reinvigorated. I could see things, feel them and sometimes even smell them. So many dates in a person’s life, so many wonderful experiences and some bitter ones. Some dates which are important and some events, which make the other dates important. All the events were very carefully articulated with my favourite fountain pen. I remember those moments when I wrote them and slowly we were Confidant. As days and dates turned through the pages, I started feeling better remembering the journey I had made in my life. ‘The only thing constant in life, was change!”

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It was dawn when I read the last page and then slowly closed you and held you close to my heart. When I closed my eyes, a few drops of tears rolled down my cheeks. It was as if I voyaged several years over a single night. Can’t believe we spent so many years together and now suddenly you and I will not be together anymore. But that’s life isn’t it? But you will always be close to my heart and whenever we want, will spend time together revisiting the memory lane. You will always be a Confidant and will always be closest to my heart.

Lovingly yours…

Be crazy this New Year

Yesterday was the first day of 2016. I was cleaning my house and wiping an old painting in my living room. There was a black mark on the right hand corner of the painting, which I was trying hard to remove. After several attempts when I was loosing my patience, my mom, who must have been watching me for a while, said, “The black scar is inside the frame and not external. Even if you try, it will be there like it has been since years. It’s this scar which makes this painting special dear’. She smiled at me and then went back to the book she was reading.

Wao! That was so true. We all have our scars, our hitches, our weaknesses, and our inabilities but then it’s those scars, which make us special! They make us different and in fact they define who we are. Sometimes the scars are peripheral and sometimes inner but who cares. They are ours. They tell our story, they tell how we faced life and even after we got hurt, got scarred, we stood up, fought and survived! If someone tries to change us, or get rid of our scars, well then that person is definitely not the one to be! Sometimes even we ourselves think that we are not perfect, we have this black mark in whatever way. We are so wrong and condemnatory towards self.

We are what our life’s journey has made us. We are the experiences we had and the fights we fought. We are survivors! No one is perfect and sometimes imperfection is our beauty, our pride and our inner soul. This new year, let’s promise that we will be happy the way we are and not be ashamed of our scars, be it inner or outer. We will laugh loudly, act madly, speak truly, dance insanely, live freely and love genuinely.

Wishing everyone a crazy new year😉

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Companionship….

Humans have managed to define every relationship, be it mother, father, husband, partner or friend. Every relationship has their outlined protocols and precincts. We behave the way we are supposed to when we fall in one of those defined categories. But sometimes the heart subjugates the brain and the frontiers are traversed.

A companion is a person who’s just there with you, like a perpetual company. A companion can be your best friend or anyone who is with you in your journey of life without much of an expectation. Companionship is beyond just friendship even if they are sometimes synonymous. The feeling that someone is there for you whatever may happen in life is what companionship is all about.

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There are days when you don’t want to talk to anyone, no one! When you just want to talk to that one person who you know will listen to you without being judgmental and just smile and say, “Everything is fine”! You might not meet your companion everyday or even every year but you know that they are there with you every single moment. This feeling is very serene and comforting. We all are so lonely in this modern world. Social media connects us but is only a reflection of our social existence, which we want to share. No one cares what’s deep inside the heart and the mind, which is personal and never social.

Companionship is a bond, which is build in a certain moment and nurtured over time by being sincere to the relationship. You will only ever be lucky to have a companion if you are true to yourself and your companion. You don’t need any commitment other than that strong feeling inside your heart to trust this one person when the world seems void. Just lend your hand and you will feel the other hand holding on to yours. Life’s good when you have a companion🙂

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The marketplace in India tells you what the real India is about. People who have so much pain in their lives, yet they are not scared to smile, to laugh and even to make you laugh!

Incredible India!

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The Random Conscience!

I am still a kid. I argue, I fight, I be adamant and then I cry. I am possessive, obsessed and sometimes even jealous. I break rules. I say sorry and do the same mistakes again. I am crazy, unreasonable but loveable. I like to watch the sky, the birds and the airplanes high up in the midst of the clouds. I love to get wet in the rain and play in the mud. I have a best friend. I want to drive a car and speed. I have no limits when I love. I have a mind which wanders around anywhere, anytime and comes back home once in a while. I hate definitions and boundaries. I am uncontrollable sometimes. I am loyal. I can confess. I stammer sometimes. I don’t hate pets. I am soft. I read books. I like poetry. I have favourites. I have innocence. My love is quite raw and unpolished. I like silence. I love noise. I love friends. I love music. I can’t dance but I love trying. I play games with myself. I am impractical. I am irrational. I can fight. I can win, even hearts. I love old people. I love surprises. I give surprises. I give gifts. I love camera. I love pens. I love memories. I dream. I dare. I fall and get up again and sometimes I again fall. I don’t give up. I hurt myself. I lose myself. I sometimes even find myself. I speak the truth. I am blunt. I am sharp. I am intelligent. I am the greatest fool. This is me, deal with me or let go.

P.S. I care.

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